![]() Papa Bear asked, “Do you see a snare and a radio collar under my pillow. They moved into the bedroom with growing alarm. ![]() It smells musky and sweaty and not at all clean.” Do you smell something else, Baby?”īaby Bear said, “Yes, I do. He asked, “Do you smell something else, Mama?” Suspicious, they rose from the table and went into the living room. Does yours smell off, Baby?”īaby Bear said, “Yes, it does. When the bears finally came home, they sat down to eat breakfast. But the bears took so long to come back from their walk that she fell asleep. Goldilocks chortled and thought: “These bears will be my ticket to the top! I’ll show those twerps at the university the kind of guts it takes to do real research!” She crouched in a corner of the bedroom and waited. Her plan was to drug the bears and, when they stumbled into their bedroom to take a nap, lash radio collars to their necks as their heads hit the pillows. Then, in the bedroom, she rigged snares beneath the pillows of each bed. ![]() In the kitchen, she laced the bowls of porridge with a tranquilizing potion. With scientific espionage the only thing in mind, Goldilocks broke into the bears’ cottage. Her intent was to collar the bears with radio transmitters and then follow them in their migratory and other life patterns, with an utter disregard for their personal (or rather, animal) privacy. The rogue biologists had been watching the cottage for some time. At one time she had been a professor, but her aggressive, masculine approach to science - ripping off the thin veil of Nature, exposing its secrets, penetrating its essence, using it for her own selfish needs, and bragging about such violations in the letters columns of various magazines - had led to her dismissal. She was you see, a biologists who specialized in the study of anthropomorphic bears. ![]() Her name was Goldilocks, and she had been watching the bears for days. So they left their bowls to cool and took a walk to visit their animal neighbors.Īfter the bears left, a melanin-improvised young wommon emerged from the bushes and crept up to the cottage. But straight off the stove, the porridge was too thermally enhanced to eat. Papa Bear had prepared big bowls of all-natural porridge for them to eat. One day, in their little anthropomorphic cottage, they sat down to breakfast. Nevertheless, they tried to be happy and took steps to avoid these pitfalls, such as naming their offspring the non-gender-specific “Baby.” They were very sorry about this, of course, since the nuclear family has traditionally served to enslave womyn, instill a self-righteous moralism in its members, and imprint rigid notions of heterosexualist roles onto the next generation. Through the thicket, across the river, and deep, deep in the woods, lived a family of bears - a Papa Bear, a Mama Bear, and a Baby Bear - and they all lived together anthropomorphically in a little cottage as a nuclear family. ![]()
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